MAY 22, 2014
Listening
Read: Job
2:11-13
Oh, that I had one to hear me! —Job
31:35
In her book Listening
to Others, Joyce Huggett writes about the importance of learning to listen and
respond effectively to those in difficult situations. As she relates some of
her own experiences of listening to suffering people, she mentions that they
often thank her for all she’s done for them. “On many occasions,” she writes,
“I have not ‘done’ anything. I have ‘just listened.’ I quickly came to the
conclusion that ‘just listening’ was indeed an effective way of helping
others.”
This was the help Job
sought from his friends. While it is true that they sat with him for 7 days in
silence, “for they saw that his grief was very great” (2:13), they didn’t
listen when Job started talking. Instead, they talked and talked but failed to
comfort him (16:2). “Oh, that I had one to hear me!” Job cried (31:35).
Listening says, “What
matters to you matters to me.” Sometimes people do want advice. But often they
just want to be listened to by someone who loves and cares about them.
Listening is hard
work, and it takes time. It takes time to listen long enough to hear the other
person’s true heart, so that if we do speak, we speak with gentle wisdom.
Oh, Lord, give us a
loving heart and a listening ear.
I cried, and from His
holy hill
He bowed a listening
ear;
I called my Father,
and my God,
And He subdued my fear.
—Watts
When I’m thinking
about an answer while others are talking—I’m not listening.
Insight
Job was in financial
ruin, had just lost all 10 of his children (Job 1:13-19), and had suddenly
taken ill (2:7). As a result, three of Job’s friends did what normal good
friends would do in the face of life’s pain: they traveled long distances to be
with Job in order to comfort him (vv.11-12). Participating in Job’s grief and
pain (v.12), “they sat down with him on the ground seven days and seven nights”
(v.13). This was the normal duration for grieving the loss of a loved one in
the ancient Near East (Gen. 50:10; 1 Sam. 31:13). And sitting on the ground was
their way of showing deep sorrow (Isa. 3:26; Lam. 2:10; Jonah 3:6). Yet,
despite his friends’ initial good start, the majority of the counseling they
gave him was unhelpful or wrong.
Source:
Our Daily Bread 2012
